Write Back

Lauren Becker

I write in Courier, like a typewriter. It is widely assumed that I own a typewriter. My letters are often discarded because they are written in Courier. I like when people put circles over their "i"s instead of dots. Usually girls. I've never known a boy to do this, but there might be one or two. I don't know why letters start with dear. I find it inappropriately intimate. I have one of those poetry magnet sets that I divided into two sets of adjectives -- one of only colors -- and one set of nouns. I choose a regular adjective, then a color adjective, then a noun, put "my" in front and create a singular salutation, such as my worthy purple saddle or my sardonic green bedroom. I have never chosen the same twice. If I did, I would re-select the general adjective and maybe the noun. I have a pile of adverbs for the end. I add one to "yours." My last letter concluded with thirstily yours. Some people think it's like Mad Libs but that's just stupid.